I hope you were just excited when reading this post title as I was when I typed it out. My first ever South African Braai! It was a big day for me. Chicken wings, pork belly, succulent steak, and what was described to me as the “best ribs in the world”. Holy shit, am I right? Oh wait. I’M VEGETARIAN. SCREW EVERYONE. I MAY AS WELL GET ON A PLANE HOME.
Just kidding. It was an Easter Braai, so obviously I skipped off to the supermarket with Boy and bought bundles of chocolate as the only acceptable table decor.
Oh yeahhhh. It’s a lot easier when people make fun of you for not eating meat (what is all this hate in this cruel world, am I right?) when you have a mouthful of chocolate. I CAN’T HEAR YOU OVER ALL THIS DELICIOUSNESS.
Anyway, I’d been waiting for a braai for a long time. But it kind of just seemed like a normal barbecue. Watch this space, ey?
I was pretty in with Boy’s family at this point. By this, I mean I met them at the pub a couple of nights earlier and had enough drinks in me to seem like I was cool and their cousin wasn’t dating a socially awkward loser. Hollllaaaaaaa.
I think I was hungover this day though (like most days). Spot the giant water bottle.
Step 2 of curing a hangover (Step 1 is obviously the water) is carbs. Time to carb up.
I tried to help, but Boy was pretty much running the show. As he does. The first arguement I’ve ever heard between him and his Mum was about timing of food being cooked. I kind of just removed myself, but if I had to choose sides I would clearly pick hers. It was still only a few days in meeting her. Sorry Boy, I gotta do what I gotta do.
Whilst I could merely smell the meat, I focused my attention elsewhere. Good thing Boy’s Mum makes a delicious salad (she honestly does I promise I’m not just saying this just in case HI NIKKI IF YOU’RE READING!!!)
But actually. Just look at them.
Big, beautiful bowls of glory.
Oh, then there was this. Whatever. Meat is so 2014 can I get an amen.
(Trying not to cry inside).
Nikki got me some halloumi, which was just as popular as the meat can I just say.
LOOK AT THIS SPREADDDDDD.
Load ’em up.
I also bought some veggie fingers (which were really just poatoes and veg in a crispy finger shape) to further exclude myself from the group. Note that the second braai I went to with Boy’s friends I brought along some special ‘Vegetarian Braai Sausages’. What can I say, I’m the life of the party.
Anyway, these went really well with my second helping. Boy’s timing was all off. He got really grumpy when I repeatedly kept asking about them as well (sorry please don’t hurt me).
I was munching away and only discovered that Nikki had made salad dressing when I had 1/3 of my second helping left. Didn’t even need it! (HI NIKKI)
When it came to dessert, I couldn’t resist picking up a couple of boxes of these bad boys. A Bridges family tradition, really. I should be paid for the amount I talk about them, Magnum if you’re listening holla atcha girl.
When Boy took this selfie I bet he didn’t think it would be stamped onto the Internet forever. Take that for calling me a cheater when I beat you at cards. People don’t forget.
So, verdict? To me, it was like an English barbecue. BUT – I think the fact that I’ve hung out with Boy for over two years means that all my barbecues have gotten to braai standards thanks to him, so I probably don’t even know the difference anymore. Apart from that veggie sausages here are pretty shit, no wonder everyone eats meat.